Myths About Wife Assault
- Men who assault their wives are mentally ill.
Wife assault is too widespread to be explained away by mental illness. Most men who assault their wives confine their violence to the privacy of their own home. The abuse is often directed to particular parts of the body that will not visibly bruise. Obvious restraint and forethought is necessary to accomplish this. Violent husbands are not likely to attack their bosses when frustrated. If man is truly mentally ill, he would lack the ability to be selective and controlled in his administration of abuse.
- Alcohol causes a man to beat his wife.
While alcohol is often abused by the violent partner, it is not the cause of violence. Rather, it facilitates the use of physical force by allowing the offender to blame the alcohol.
- Only poor women get beaten.
Victims of wife assault come from all walks of life- rich/poor, black/white, rural/urban, educated/uneducated, full time housewives/career women.
- Women provoke violence. Therefore, they deserve what they get.
No women deserves to be beaten, regardless of the kind of person she is.
- Women enjoy the abuse and find it sexually stimulating.
Women do not find pleasure in abuse, nor it is a sexual turn-on. In fact, women are terrified, horrified and disgusted when their partner turns on them.
- If women were really bothered by the assault, they would speak up.
Assaulted women do not find remain silent because of fear. They blame themselves for the abuse. Female role conditioning also plays a role with an emphasis on passivity and compliance.
- Men who beat their wives are a danger to the community
Wife beaters seldom attack anyone outside their family. They know they would not likely get away with it.
- Assaulted women could leave their abusive partners if they wanted to.
Women remain in abusive relationship for many reasons. Economic reasons, no where to go, hope he will change, commitment to a successful marriage, and fear.
- Pregnant women are protected from violent atttacks.
In fact, many women who are pregnant are more vulnerable to violence. Many women describe the abuse starting when they were first pregnant or the violence escalating during pregnancy.